like ann landers minus the whole dead thing...
i've decided to become an advice columnist. i have no journalism experience nor do i necessarily give good advice. but i tend to find myself in situations where i'm always giving it just the same. so i figured, why not become an advice columnist? there's bound to be decent money in it and who knows, maybe i can pick up some boys that are on the rebound.
sure the advice i give usually isn't asked for but rather volunteered by me and usually involves me interrupting someone to interject my opinion. but still. i mean someone's gotta tell them they're a moron.
and you know, i think i usually give pretty good advice. i mean i've only ever broken up 3 or 4 marriages. kidding. really i am. it was just one.
and just cuz i don't ever take my own advice doesn't mean other people shouldn't. really if you think about it, my track record with boys should make me even more of an expert in what not to do in a relationship. right?
anyway i just thought it'd be fun to be a gossip columnist uh i mean advice columnist for a little while. so ask away folks. the doctor is in.
posted by Sara @ 18:57
4 comments
4 Comments:
Uhh...Dear...Sara?
Well, I have had this problem lately. I met this girl... yeah, she is trouble with a capital T. She has a lot of baggage, but yet I am fascinated with her and I can't get her out of my head. Oh, she has a boyfriend who is a dick to her, but yet she stays with him and she calls me to talk and is basically driving me crazy. What do I do?
Miserable, with a capital T
Dear Sara Landers,
What should I do? I have no friends, I've stopped working out, I keep a lot plants but they are all dying, I have old beer and chorizo in my fridge, I'm broke, I am slightly paranoid at all times, all the hot men I meet are gay and there are only 2 Wendy's in LA proper.
Sincerely,
Lost in LA
Dear Advice Girl,
What should I make for dinner?
Sincerely,
Hungry Hungry Hippo
Dear Advice Sara Girl,
So, I am talking to this girl who has a boyfriend and who has made it clear to me of what things are. Then tonight she tells me some pretty detailed sexual stuff. Then she gets a call. She comes back. I jokingly ask bootycall? She says no, she doesnt do that. Then she says that she could actually go for one tonight. Then I tell her to call her boyfriend. She laughs it off. Then we go on talking about other things. Then she tells me that tomorrow night she will help me rub one out, wait just kidding she says. I then tell her that I don't know when to believe her or take her serious. Silence. Then I ask her should I take you serious. She tells me night, I pause, say night, and that is it.
Please help me.
Sincerely,
Who the fuck does this girl think she is guy
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